What a month

This post could not start without saying that a few weeks ago my partner, Casey, passed away. We were going through a divorce and things must have been hard for hir and so, we think, sie took hir life.

I'll be moving back to North America at the end of March (next week).

In February I had my audiogram. I wasn't terribly upset that I didn't fib (much) or get hearing aids because I was planning to leave the country at the end of March anyways because of the divorce and it would have taken too long on a wait list to get hearing aids. It's okay...

In any event I shall have to pay for my hearing aids, which I am fine with.

The audiogram wasn't what I'd like it to be, obviously, but I'm okay with that.


Lately, with Casey's death I've not been too adversely effected by my BIID - I've been off work for a few weeks so I can control sound for the most part. There's been far too much going on for it to have an effect on me.


(Oh, and to anyone who would like to comment: Please don't say "I'm sorry for your loss" - I've heard it a thousand times to date and it is now meaningless. Think of something else to say to express that you think it sucks that my spouse took hir life.)

Where have I been?

I've been in my own little world. I was in Canada for three weeks over Christmas and New Years. I've told Casey that it's over and that I want a divorce.

Yeah... the 'D' word (no the other 'd' word). I've been trying to sort out what is going to happen to me after the fact and to make sure I still have a job after it's done. I haven't filed papers yet (doesn't matter when I do it cos Casey will not contest it) since I'm trying to get everything in order beforehand. To make matters more stressful I've got an audiogram coming up soon that I'm trying to "prepare" for.

On the BIID front: I've been meaning to make a post about the inadequacies of words like 'need' and 'want' and 'desire' with respect to those afflicted by BIID but my focus of late is entirely on dealing with the situation at hand.

Life for me is very stressful as of late. Life is very much "same shit different day"