A sort of double standard

It should be no surprise that I post to various Deaf/HOH forums around the net (obviously not giving away my 'secret'). I did a google search for 'deaf wannabe' and similar terms and we're (deaf/hoh-wannabe/pretender) not widely accepted in the Deaf community.

In the Deaf community there are many people that are very happy to be deaf. I can completely understand their sentiment. ;-)

There are those in the Deaf community that take offence that those of us who wish to be deaf/hard of hearing. Perhaps they feel it is an intrusion of a hearing person into the "Deaf culture." Much in the same way the wacko Janice Raymond believed transwomen are trying to invade women's space.

I wonder what ratio of people that are happy to be deaf (non DW) accept DW people into their community.

Frankly it doesn't matter to me. I seek no one's approval (except perhaps for Casey's). Before I met Casey I certainly had these wishes and would have been happy to live my own life as a deaf (little 'd') person using sign language and hearing aids to regulate acute hearing.

Since I've met Casey, however, nothing has really changed. I love communicating with hir. Sie is very intelligent and my desire to be deaf/hoh certainly doesn't mean I wish to cease communiating with hir. Incidentally this is one thing I worry that sie will assume.

In short the double standard seems to be: "It's okay for us to enjoy our deafness since it wasn't a choice for us but since you want to be deaf it isn't okay." I stress that not everyone shares that double standard but it is something I have observed in SOME MEMBERS of the Deaf community.